This is an image of a MLRA (male lion’s rights activist) being oppressed by feminist lionesses. He was simply making a joke about them getting back in the den and caring for the cubs, but feminist lionesses have no sense of humor and bullied this poor Mufasa looking motherfucker. Tragically beautiful.
J. Smooth on dudes who need to tell other dudes to stop being douchebags.
“Now is not the time to make ‘fetch’ happen with the misandry thing.”
It is in fact possible to recognize that constructions of masculinity are damaging and that there is gender inequality that goes both ways without supporting the cesspool that is the Men’s Rights Movement.
The biggest problem with the term “misandry” is the false equivalency that these oppressions are remotely on the scale of misogyny. They are not. In fact, most of them are rooted in oppression of minorities, such as women or trans* people or queer people or people of color or poor people.
Of course sexism affects men — but it primarily affects men because it oppresses women. This is what I mean when I say (as I do, and often) that there is no institutional sexism against cis men. There isn’t. There is institutional sexism against women that creates awful, damaging constructions of masculinity based on societal distaste for femininity. Lest we forget, constructions of masculinity are damaging because femininity and associated characteristics are seen as bad. Standard constructions of masculinity and the pressure to conform thereof stems from misogyny, not some new brand of anti-male sentiment. The fact that sexual assault and domestic violence against men goes underreported is a direct result of this societal terror of “feminine weakness” in our cis men. Not to oversimplify an incredibly complicated piece of intersectionality, but this is in part why trans* people (especially trans* women) and gay men are seen as some sort of aberration by the more odious parts of our society — femininity itself, and all incarnations or perceived parallels thereof, is fucking terrifying. Why do you think Michigan just got so horrified by one woman talking about her vagina?
Originally this was written as a response to a single inbox message, and then I got a couple more of them, and now it’s a letter to all of you. I am tired of you.
[TRIGGER WARNING: Rape, rape culture; eating disorders]
It must be exhausting carrying all this hate around, huh? You’re right! It is fucking exhausting! And if it makes me seem like a cranky, miserable bitch, then more power to me.
Do you know why I do it, though? You don’t really deserve an explanation, but I’m going to tell you anyway.
I do it because women’s bodies are sold and used to sell products and somehow this has become one and the same. Because a woman’s accomplishments will never be as important as her appearance in this society as it stands now. Because 65% of girls and women have reported eating disorders.
Because so many, many people — most of them men — tell me I am overreacting or hysterical or a cranky, miserable bitch when I talk about sexism.
Because if I had a dime for every time some privileged, pompous ass doesn’t listen to me or tells me I’m wrong for no reason, really, just because he has a thing for Scarlett Johansson’s hair and doesn’t want to think about the fact that hey, maybe women are represented badly in the media, I could probably pay my rent for a year.
Because men feel entitled to tell me their opinions on women and entitled to be skeptical of my opinions on women as if I am not better able to comment, as if men are considered the experts on absolutely everything — oh wait, because the entire fucking news media thinks that they are.
Because I live in a world where I spend way too much of my time calculating the possibility that I will be assaulted. I do not know any woman who doesn’t do this. I do not know any woman who doesn’t constantly consider and reconsider the risk of her activities, even if she doesn’t do it consciously, even if she no longer thinks twice about going to the grocery store by herself — if she does it late at night, you can bet there’s a part of her that’s thinking it.
Because I live in a world where I have been told since I was single-digits young that men can hurt me. I live in a world where one out of six of my peers will be raped or sexually assaulted in her lifetime, and 54% of those assaults will go unreported, and 97% of those rapists will walk free. I live in a world where nine out of ten reported rape victims are female-bodied and the vast majority of rapists are men. I live in a world where 2/3rds of the women who are raped are raped by people they know and trust. This is the world I live in. This is a world you don’t even have to think about. This is a world that allows you to feel entitled to tell me my opinions don’t matter to you because they were presented in a way that didn’t cater to your ego, and call me a “cranky, miserable bitch” in the meantime as if you have any idea of whether or not I am actually either of those things.
So no, I do not need to be polite about your “counter-points.” I do not need to say “Ah, yes, good point,” when you’re not making a good point at all. You are not unique. You have said to me what literally hundreds of other men have said to me before.
And I don’t need to listen to your bullshit, or anyone else’s bullshit. Ever.
Common misconceptions about and questions asked of misandry, misogyny, and feminism.
1. You feminists just hate men!
I have never met a woman, feminist or not, who hates men. I have met women who fear men or are uncomfortable around men, but never one who hates them. If they exist, and I have SERIOUS doubts that they do, then it’s likely they have a reason - please see question two for why.
2. So you’re trying to tell me that men are never ever hated or prejudiced against?
Nope. I’m sure men are sometimes the victim of prejudice. However, that is a far different thing than being the victim of an institutional setup that oppresses, dehumanizes, and objectifies them. Men do not experience institutional oppression, dehumanization, or objectification. Because women experience institutional oppression, dehumanization, and objectification at the hands of a society built by and ruled by men, it does not surprise me that many women are uncomfortable around or fear men, particularly when most perpetrators of rape, sexual harassment and violence, and domestic violence are men. Not all, not by a long shot, but the overwhelming majority. Though victims are of all gender identities, the fact that a woman’s body is treated like property means she is less likely to be believed when she comes forward with an accusation. Trans* and nonbinary women, as well as trans* men, are even less likely to be believed than cis* women (or women who identify as the gender they were assigned at birth).
3. Yes they do! They totally hate men!
No, they don’t.
4. YES THEY DO, MISANDRIST!
No, they don’t. And pointing out a fact doesn’t mean I hate men. But seriously: the higher up one goes on the ladder in any given industry, the fewer women are represented. We have yet to have had a woman president. Women are still paid less, receive less bonuses and raises, and support for mothers in the workplace is virtually nonexistent in MANY sectors. Structural sexism exists, and it affects women.
5. Misandry is just as important as misogyny!
It’s not, actually. Misogyny is widely accepted and tolerated (see: Chris Brown performing at the Grammys). Misogyny is used in an overwhelming number of ad campaigns (see: GoDaddy’s Superbowl commercial, almost every single commercial produced for Axe, almost every ad that’s not aimed at children, ever. Yes, all those commercials for cleaning products that are only aimed at women are examples of sexism and sometimes misogyny).
6. You’re overreacting. Why do you have to be so sensitive? This isn’t really that big of a deal. It doesn’t affect your day-to-day life or anything. Jesus, what’s wrong with you? Why are all you feminazis so man-hating? Men are oppressed too! Look whatever, I’ll talk to you later, I have to go get raped by this exam, ugh.