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3 posts tagged the avengers

3 posts tagged the avengers
[SPOILERS FOR THE AVENGERS, THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN, AND THE DARK KNIGHT RISES]
Let’s be frank, here: in the last three major superhero movies of the summer, women were absolutely instrumental to the men saving shit. As in, it would not have gotten done without them. And yet they were not the main focus.
Natasha Romanoff? Oh, nbd, just casually doing flips and shit through the air and learning how to use EXTRATERRESTRIAL TECH ON THE FLY, LITERALLY, to close the fucking portal that is letting the alien army in through the sky. Who would have done that if not her? Thor was hammering aliens in the dead-if-whacked bits, Cap was shielding people in the brain, Iron Man was fending off a nuclear warhead, Hulk was smashing stuff, and Hawkeye was… you know, hawk-eyeing the scene. Natasha fends off an army of helmeted slug-monkeys with Clint as her partner and then just casually ACROBAT-FLIPS ONTO AN ONCOMING ALIEN AIR-JETSKI, OVERTAKES IT, and FLIPS HER WAY DOWN ONTO STARK TOWER TO CLOSE A PORTAL USING MORE ALIEN TECHNOLOGY. No one else on that team would have had the guts to do that. Cap and Bruce would have wanted to know the repercussions, Tony didn’t even THINK of it when faced with Loki’s staff + portal made from the same stuff powering Loki’s staff, Thor would have been all “NO, BUT MAGIC, AND THINGS!” and Clint maybe would have agreed but not of his own accord - he observes more than he acts. That’s his strength. Natasha acts. I will readily admit the heroism is basically equally distributed here, but that equal distribution means that Natasha Romanoff was just as vital as any one of the dudes.
Gwen Stacy? She’ll just be over there, making the goddamn antidote that gets rid of all the lizard people, evacuating a target building and thereby saving hundreds of lives, then BLOWTORCHING A LIZARD-MONSTER WHO WAS PREVIOUSLY HER MENTOR IN THE FACE WITH A HOME-MADE BLOWTORCH in order to buy herself and Peter time and attempt to keep him away from the machine that will let his plan go into action. You know, whatever.
Selina Kyle? It’s whatever, her actions are only the impetus that get Bruce “My Parents Are Dead” Wayne off his dumb ass to start saving shit again. She only opens up the only way off of Gotham to save a crapload of people, something that JGL “Bad Parallel To Dick Grayson” Blake couldn’t manage. She only comes back to SAVE BRUCE WAYNE’S FOOL ASS by GUNNING BANE IN THE TEMPLE, thereby ALLOWING THE REST OF THE MOVIE TO END WITHOUT A NUCLEAR BOMB GOING OFF IN NEW YORK GOTHAM.
The ladies of these movies are running the show, and yet they’re still mostly supporting characters (and I do mean supporting, as in, the entire thing would fucking crumble without them). So what gives? Give me a fucking Wonder Woman movie, and not one written by the chump who wrote Green Lantern! ARGH!
[Image description: Two inbox messages from the same user.
The first reads: “In response to your last post about Natasha’s hair, I believe you’re overlooking a few things. The first is that in training to fight at that level you learn to use more than just your sight to fight, so the twirling of hair would not affect her ability to fight so much as you might think. Furthermore, it provides a distraction to the opponent, twirling red hair will pull on their senses and could distract them for the second too long, martial artists often tied red strings to their swords…”
The second reads: “(in continuing that first ask) You also neglect the fact that fighting with her body was not the only, nor even the primary, weapon she utilized in her job. Sensuality is often a more effective weapon than fists could ever be, and she does, in fact, use it as a weapon several times in the avengers movie. These are just some counterpoints to consider..”]
(In reference to this post). You know, I was waiting for one of these. Tumblr never disappoints. Allow me to dissect your points in the order in which you present them.
Natasha is such a super-badass spy with so much training that even if her hair gets in her face it doesn’t matter, because she relies on senses other than sight to do her work.
Well, you’re half right. It’s likely that when her vision is obscured, Natasha Romanoff is 100% able to rely on other senses and fight just as well as if her vision was unobscured. However, if you’ve ever tried to do anything physical with long hair flying all around you and in your face, then you know it is incredibly distracting and a huge pain in the ass. Black Widow is a super-spy. There is absolutely no reason for her not to have a friggin’ hair tie to pull her hair back before she starts doing flips and shit. It is a practical thing to do. You can do it while in motion. It takes all of half a second.
I didn’t say it would affect her ability to fight. I said that having long hair flying around is an impractical, distracting thing to do. And further, what kind of idiot would allow themselves a handicap they can avoid when going into a fight? That is some STUPID shit. Natasha Romanoff is not stupid. If she were stupid, she would be dead.
Even if it’s a distraction to her, it’s a bigger distraction to other people, because martial artists used to tie red strings to their swords!
String tied to a sword isn’t constantly in your eyes and getting in the way of your movements. String tied to a sword won’t hurt or distract you if it gets caught in something. Comparing “string tied to a sword” with “masses of curly red hair getting in your eyes” is such a bad analogy it’s a little ridiculous you chose it as basis for your argument. They’re not the same thing.
As we’ve established, Natasha is not a stupid person. As a super-spy and a superhero who is very, very good at her job, she is incredibly practical. She did not need to distract her opponent in this scenario. Why in hell would she therefore use a technique that’s dubious at best, as it handicaps her (even slightly) and isn’t necessary?
Natasha isn’t really a badass in the way that, like, James Bond is a badass. She uses her sexuality to fight. Didn’t you even SEE The Avengers?
YAWN. I’m typing “YAWN” because you as a reader cannot see me actually yawn with boredom over this tired, tired fucking way of writing off stupid costuming decisions about female superheroes to make them sexy instead of powerful. THIS ARGUMENT IS SO OLD. IT IS SO BORING. IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE. It is SO. FUCKING. RIDICULOUS. And it is a way to justify a desire to see a woman doing something sexy while also kicking ass, because if she’s not sexy, who cares what else she’s doing, right? Badass women are only there to be my own personal fighting fucktoys! Duh!
You realize that by trying to make this argument you are inevitably going to contradict yourself, right? Because if you take the obvious facts — that things like push-up bras, heeled boots, long hair, cleavage on display, etc are not comfortable, practical, or acceptable gear for superheroes or super-spies as they inhibit bodily motion, provide distractions, and possibly provide weaknesses (your boobs are on your chest, after all, and if they’re not covered someone CAN shoot you there; long hair can be pulled and wrapped around an attackers hands and wrists, hence why one of the first things done in the military is chopping off everyone’s hair; your center of balance is off in heels and they HURT YOUR FEET) — there is no way to say “This character is an intelligent badass and therefore she would totally have her hair down, to use as, you know, a distraction or something.” That doesn’t work! The potential consequences FAR outweigh the very slight benefit of a possible distraction, and they create handicaps. Even a slight handicap can mean the difference between life and death when you’re a SUPERHERO/SUPERSPY fighting AN INTERGALACTIC ARMY.
Did you watch the same movie I did? Because I saw it five times, and every time I saw Natasha Romanoff intentionally using gender stereotypes that other people (men!) project onto her in order to get what she wanted, which is a SIGHT different from using her sexuality to get what she wants. It’s not often done, and it’s not what you’re used to seeing, so I’m not surprised you read it as something it wasn’t. She knows how men will react to her and treat her because men in that universe act the same about women that men in this universe do - they assume they’re weak, they’re sentimental and emotional and that their sentimentality will get the better of them, and that what they care about most is being pretty. Natasha cares about doing her job well. She wants to wipe the red out of her ledger. Period.
I took the liberty of checking out your profile and I see that you are a guy with short hair, and as such, you have literally no idea what you’re talking about. Have you ever worn your hair long and tried to do something physical with it down? Because I get the distinct sense you haven’t. You wouldn’t be asking this asinine question otherwise. No woman would EVER wear her long, curly hair down and in her face while doing something that physical and difficult (and badass). Ever. No woman would kick ass in a push-up bra unless she had to (I do not doubt that most women could). This is because push-up bras and heeled boots (don’t even get me started on Agent Hill’s ridiculous wedge boots) and long hair are not practical, they’re not comfortable, and they inhibit the job that superheroes do.
If you actually think that Black Widow uses her sexuality more than she uses her incredible bodily skill in physical combat, not to mention her clearly above-average intelligence, then you are simply not paying attention to what you’re watching. And worse, you’re being demeaning while doing so.
“I’d have to wear pasties to greenlight any of these movies…They’re always fighting in a bra, so while it might be exciting for a still photo, it’s ridiculous. One of the most exciting thing about [The Avengers,] is that in my opening scene the first thing you see is my character getting punched in the face. Everybody’s like, ‘Damn, it’s nice to see a girl get the shit kicked out of her…Superheroine movies are normally really corny and bad. They’re always like, fighting in four inch heels with their [thrusting out her chest] like a two-gun salute.”
(via think-progress)